apple juice

today, the sun came out after a long period of grey. but I spent most of the day sad. we went to church today and amazing people that barely know us or matt took up a collection to contribute to madeline’s fund. it was overwhelming, again. and so I’m crying, again. nuts. and then the sun comes out.

and I look up at the sun and I’m wondering about nothing, about this tree that is bleeding water, and i can hear the woodpecker, but i can’t see it and I’m raking up the leaves that I forgot to take care of in the fall. now they are decomposing and kind of gross. but the yard looks a lot nicer now than it did before. i want to plant a garden but i also want to sit on the couch.

and the sun is still out. and i found a hole in the floor of our garage. seriously. a big hole. sonja’s car had broken through the floor. luckily I could back it out. the ground is disappearing underneath our garage. now that i have looked at the floor of our garage in new ways, it is clear i should have seen this coming. there is an obvious rectangle of previous repair. six inches from the new hole.

and the sun stayed out all day.